Posted in And there was light.., Just messing with my mind, Let's talk about LOVE

Biglaan lang..

Bakit ba tayo nagmamahal?

Bakit ba tayo pumapasok sa isang relasyon?

Gayong alam naman natin masasaktan lang tayo?

Bakit nga ba tayo nasasaktan?

Bakit ba tayo naloloko? Bakit may nagpapaloko?


Minsan naiisip ko bakit ba tayo nasa relasyon?

Bakit ang sarap sa feeling ng umpisa?

Pagkatapos mauuwi lang din sa wala ang lahat?

Para san pa na magbibigay ka ng oras mo, panahon at pagmamahal

Kung sa bandang huli iiwan ka lang din o maghihiwalay lang din kayo..

Para san ang masasayang usapan? masasayang oras nyo?

Kung mapapalitan lang din naman yun lahat ng sakit..

Para san pa na ibigay mo lahat-lahat

Kung sa bandang huli di rin naman pala sapat

Kung di ka rin sapat para sa taong yun

Di sapat para mahalin ka lang at di lokohin

Di sapat para maging tapat


Nakakalungkot isipin.. minsan sa buhay

Kelangan pa natin sumugal para lang malaman

Malaman kung tama o mali

Kelangan pa nating magbigay ng buong sarili natin

Para sa bandang huli sisirain

Diko maisip kung bakit natin ginagawa mga bagay na ginagawa natin

Nagmamahal tayo..

PERO bakit tayo kelangan masaktan?



Posted in Just messing with my mind

A topic to discuss

You know when sometimes you run out of words to say?

Like your mind goes into a complete and utter shutdown.. Like a light bulb that goes off all of a sudden..

I get this sometimes.. especially in situations that are far more overwhelming to comprehend like someone saying nasty things to you.. or it could be your mind goes on auto shut off when the person talking infront of you is boring as hell.. or when someone is trying to discuss something completely out of your brain’s league something out of this world and incomprehensible.. or someone you wish never to talk to you starts talking to you again..

How do you normally react to these kinds of situation? When you’re at a loss for words.. When your tongue rolls up inside your mouth.. When all the words even the alphabets lose their meaning in your brain.. How do  you deal exactly??

I guess if you’re someone as transparent as me, it would be so easy to detect but I’m amazed at people who don’t seem to have a single blind spot in their brains.. they just keep going and going and going.. as if their brains work on machines and on hyper drive every single time.. But I have yet to find an actual person who does that.. really..

This could also apply in times when I am looking for a topic to post and write about. I guess a part of the reason also comes from having a lot of topics to choose from, there are so many that you end up not coming up with one.

I guess all in all people have to have some off days sometimes. It allows us to gather more things to think about, and process in our thinking tanks. The way to deal with it at times is just to be subtle.. it’s all about exercising your brain so that even if you shut down you still know how to handle the conversation when necessary or in my case now to wing it in order to put out..


Till my next blot of ink! 🙂



Posted in Just messing with my mind

When she cries..

I am a cry baby..

I admit it and I ain’t denying it..

I cry over the smallest and shallowest things..

I cry in movies, I cry for tv shows, even commercials, I cry even at times for no apparent reason..

Some days a good cry is all you need..

To wash away the dirt from your eyes

To cleanse your heart and soul from all negative energy

or just to let out all pent up emotions..

Crying is good therapy if you are the type who likes to keep things bottled up inside..

One can cry with any emotion. Mostly sad but there are tears for joy as well.

I can cry at the slightest of instance, most of the time it gets triggered when the situation I am witnessing is related to family mostly about parents or sons.. even pets!

I think I got this from my mama, she used to cry for the smallest things as well. I remember I would wonder why she was crying back when I was small and we’d laugh at her especially my papa who is the bigger critique when it comes to cry babies. Oh how I miss them..


As per Wikipedia:

Crying is the shedding of tears in response to an emotional state. The act of crying has been defined as “a complex secretomotor phenomenon characterized by the shedding of tears from the lacrimal apparatus, without any irritation of the ocular structures”.[1] A related medical term islacrimation, which also refers to non-emotional shedding of tears. Crying is also known as weeping, wailing, whimpering, and bawling.[2]

For crying to be described as sobbing, it usually has to be accompanied by a set of other symptoms, such as slow but erratic inhalation, occasional instances of breath holding and muscular tremor.


I believe everyone deserves to cry from time to time.

It’s not nice to laugh at someone at this state but I guess sympathy and a willing ear is more than enough to soothe those water ducts.

(awwww! i don’t own the rights for this picture by the way..)

Till my next blot of ink! 🙂

Posted in Just messing with my mind

In a state..

Trust when broken is the hardest to mend..

A love that once was felt, could easily be swayed and blown away..

Immense affection for someone just could effortlessly be short lived..


Someone closest to your heart.. without a doubt could suddenly be ripped away..

The mind plays tricks on you.. the heart, left wounded..

Posted in Just messing with my mind

When do you let go?

When you’re at the end of a rope and dangling into oblivion.. when do you let you go?

When you’re holding on to your mom’s hand and the crowd pulls you away.. when do you let go?

When you’re shooting an arrow aiming for that target and being afraid that you’ll miss.. when do you let go?

When you’re desperate because you have lost all your savings and don’t know how it happened.. when do you let go?

When you feel like you’re losing your special someone to someone else.. when do you let go?

When you’re friend decides not to call you and starts to ignore you completely.. when do you let go?

When someone close to you succumbs to a terminal illness.. when do you let go?

When you lose someone you love to death and can’t accept they’re gone.. when do you let go?

When someone keeps rejecting you over and over again.. when do you let go?

When you are at the brink of despair, when you feel the loneliest.. when do you let go?

When the pain is just too much to bear and you can no longer find solace in anything else.. when do you let go?

Letting go.. when you’re heart is free.. your mind is free.. your whole being is free..

Letting go.. when there’s nothing left to hold on to.. when the smallest thread remains in your hands..

Let go.. Let it go..

Because holding on forever only entraps you in a myriad of disappointments and hurts..

Because holding on does not guarantee your happiness and peace of mind..

Because holding on is no longer an option..

Let go.. Let it go..

You see yourself release that piece of rope from your grasp..

You see your hand separate from the rope bleeding from holding on too long and too tightly..

Slowly gravity pulls you back to the ground.. The wind rushes past you..

You see that rope slowly diminishing from your sight, waving thru the wind as if waving to you in goodbye..

Till it’s almost just a dot from afar..

And everything is in slow motion.. You don’t hear any sound except for your own heart beat..

And you slowly close your eyes.. accept the fate that awaits you down below..


(Photo made by moi via Bitstrips)

Posted in Just messing with my mind

Attack of Sadness

A sudden rush of sadness.

Of wanting to cry.. just shedding tears for the heck of it..

An abrupt attack of loneliness, disbelief..

As if the walls of your lungs are closing in.. crushing your heart..



It hurts somewhere but don’t know where..

You feel like everything is swirling dizzyingly into one big whirlpool.. of emptiness..



 As if you’re holding on to dear life..

 Holding on to that single piece of sanity left.. before the breaking point..



That edifice you so carefully built around your emotions.. you see it slowly crumbling down..

Succumbing and surrendering to the inevitable that is an emotional collapse..



To stop the tears.. to fall into utter hopelessness..

To keep from falling down.. Hold my head up high and move on..

Posted in Just messing with my mind

Random musings of someone confused..

Don’t let yourself get caught in a situation where you reach the dead end..

Remember that some things once done can never be undone.. and consequences remain the product of your actions ..

Don’t let yourself be entangled in a trap, into a web of lies and deceit..

Remember that everyone even yourself have the capacity to fib every once in a while..

Don’t let yourself be off guard for anything or anyone with the capacity to hurt you..

Don’t let down your defenses just so you could have yourself exposed to others..

Don’t let others have the power to bend you at their own will..

For others to have any effect on you to even function normally

Everyone has a weakness, but acknowledging that weakness only makes it stronger..

If you possess poor judgment of character then be very wary of anyone who can abuse you..

You can only limit yourself for as long as you want to be.. For as long as you let others manipulate your emotions, your actions, your thoughts..

You don’t have to feel anything right away.. let it pass for awhile.. let it go..

Because if you hold on too much, you give away too much reflecting so much of your vulnerability..

Handing over your transparency in the process.. Leaving you wide open to hurt and disappointments..

Never let it get to your head no matter how beautiful it is to your ears.. no matter how tempting..

You will yourself to take control of your life.. to everything that gives a chance for others to hold against you..

Always look out for yourself and your well being.. You should always come first.. Love yourself first..

Take into account always that respect begets respect.. so when you learn to respect your whole self then others will follow suit..

Never let anyone have the upper hand over your capability to love with all your heart yet maintain the audacity to withdraw expectations.

To give love and to open yourself to love.. that is a risk you must take.. all the above points would all be for naught if you throw caution in the air..

Love is dangerous. And so is everything else.. You learn therefore you live..